


Dynamite Mom

by caramelcoastal



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe - Domestic, Alternate Universe - Parents, Baby Junkrat, Baby Roadhog, Crack, Cute, Cute Kids, Cutesy, Gen, Mom Symmetra, Mother-Son Relationship, Not Romance, Parent AU, crackfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-02
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-19 05:34:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8192092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caramelcoastal/pseuds/caramelcoastal
Summary: Motherhood is not for everyone. Some women, like Satya Vaswani, are much more interested in their careers than having families. Of course, even then, finding homeless children left in the garbage is a disheartening experience, and one that changed her mind, just a little. How could she leave those two little boys there? Simple answer: she couldn't. Now, everything is different, and Satya is trying to figure everything out. Being a mom is a lot harder than it looks, and juggling work and being a parent feels nearly impossible, especially when every day care and babysitter within the city is terrified of your children. These are not normal children, which is okay. Because Satya finds out she's really not an ordinary mom.





	

**Author's Note:**

> THIS WAS MADE FOR MY FRIEND TUBBYBUBBI ON TUMLR WITH THIS REALLY WEIRD CRACK AU IDEA, HERE IT IS. "bby jam,bby piggie, and dynamite mom please bby PLEASE". IT TOOK FOREVER HOPE YOU LIKE IT.

Satya Vaswani was a woman with places to go and things to do. Being a Vishkar representative wasn’t easy work in the slightest. She had to be dressed nicely for that day, as well, which had taken up a large chunk of her time. Dressing up nice seemed so pointless, the more she thought on it. Why did it matter whether she came into that particular meeting wearing more makeup than usual? What was the difference between all of this blush and obnoxiously loud red lipstick, and the normal natural things she wore? Heels were difficult to walk in as well, especially as someone used to boots. While she definitely didn’t want to dress like a slob, this felt like just too much for her.

The Utopean sidewalk was filled with people just like her. They had important business as well, with their noses high in the air and their backs perfectly straight and erect. Perfect posture for perfect people, just like her. This was the only place where she truly felt at home, among people like this. 

Of course, there were the occasional undesirable sights. One or two homeless, always hard look at, very easy to ignore. A couple alleys that hadn’t gotten the hard-light treatment yet. She would get to them sooner or later, but at the moment, she needed to get to the meeting. Which, she was taking the monorail for. Speaking of which, she was about to become late. It almost never like her to be this unpunctual: but, things happen.

Unpredictable things.

The sound of a baby's crying grabbed Satya’s attention. Crying? From where? That was concerning, since she didn’t see any strollers, or parents holding little ones. It grew louder, causing Satya to start searching for the source of the crying. Vishkar or not, she still had basic maternal instincts. And at that very moment, they were beating her over the head. She needed to find out where that crying was coming from, it began to eat up at her.

She turned her head to one of the alleys and found the source of the crying: a trash can. Had someone really put a child in the garbage? She didn’t want to believe it, that a person had actually done something so horrendous to an innocent baby. Quickly, she made her way to the trash and opened it up.

Covered in rotten vegetables and filth, two little boys sat in the garbage. She couldn’t believe that someone had actually put children somewhere that roaches and maggots crawled freely, it made her sick in the stomach to even think about it. Reaching into her purse for the rubber kitchen gloves she always put on in case she had to touch something unsanitary, Satya slipped the handwear on and lifted the two little ones out. They were cold, and frightened, and who could blame them?

To try and calm their crying, she rocked them back in forth in her arms. This smeared the mess covering them onto her lovely formal wear. She cringed, hesitating a bit as the stench of rotten vegetables hit her nose. It was rancid, but the boys shouldn’t be punished for that. She supported them both, each in one arm, and began saying nice comforting things.

“I’m here, now. Do not fear. I will take care of you,” she whispered in a motherly tone. She noticed the time on her watch, and sighed.

Now, she had two choices to make. Leave these kids with the authorities who would no doubt just put them in some kind of foster care system, or call in and say that she could not come to an extremely important meeting. The vishkar representative and maternal instincts were fighting inside of her.

The maternal instincts won. She called in, very reluctantly. 

“It is Vaswani. Ms. Tyagi, I cannot come in today. I know the meeting is very important, but I have two boys who need me at the moment,” she tried to explain, but she didn’t really need to. Her boss actually laughed.

“We are speaking with world leaders today, Vaswani. This is the worst possible day you could have chosen to not come in, it is rather upsetting. But I understand. There’s no need to explain. I get it, sometimes there’s days where the little ones just cling to your leg, and you can’t bring yourself to leave”, said Ms. Tyagi. She sounded like she completely understood..

“I believe you misunderstand me. They aren’t-” She was swiftly interrupted.

“I didn’t know you had little boys. I have a five year old girl of my own, I understand how it is, Vaswani. Stay home with your little ones, we will carry on without you,” she laughed again.

“Very well. See you tomorrow,” Click. And just like that, the call was over, and Satya had to carry two toddlers home.

She took them home, to her high-rise apartment. The entire place was her favorite color; white. The kitchen was all eggshell, the carpet was seashell, the walls were ivory, the gorgeous matching lounge chair and couch set were daisy, and the carpet was pearl. It all had a very modern, almost angular look to it, with tiny hints of gold and aquamarine in the intricate designs here and there.

The two boys, she noticed, were quite funny looking. The slightly older looking little boy couldn’t be much older than four. He had big saucer eyes, and his filthy, platinum blonde hair was pulled back in a tiny pony tail. His nose and mouth were covered in a little black plastic pig snout mask. Noticeably, he was a very chunky little boy, with a big soft belly and round face. He wasn’t nearly as dirty, and all he was wearing were a torn up pair of jeans. 

Then there was the tinier one, who was around two, and he looked much worse for wear. He was missing both an arm and a leg, and he was somehow covered in even more dirt than the other one. His nose was angular, and large, with similar saucer eyes to the chubby boy. Except, his were golden, and wild, much like his hair. The poor little thing’s teeth hadn’t even come in all the way yet, and all he had to wear was a filthy diaper. What monster could do this to these small, albeit ugly little boys?

Sacrificing two of her clean towels, she wrapped them both up nice and warm. Satya was going to have to bathe them before anything, and find something to use as a diaper for the little one. Remembering one of her neighbors had just had a baby, she asked for her permission to borrow a diaper. That was covered. Now, it was time to clean both of the boys off. 

They had stopped crying once she had brought them into the apartment, but that didn’t last long. As she started the nice warm water, while the heavyset boy was perfectly content, the little one was throwing an absolute cow. She furrowed her brows, confused. Wouldn’t he like the idea of being clean? 

She wondered what was wrong with him as she made any attempt she could to put him in the nice hot water. The naked little gross boy was just thrashing and screaming, and she finally resolved to clean him off with a hot wet towel once she was done bathing the chunky boy. She put him in the bath, and got to work scrubbing. All of the sudden, in the middle of scraping every inch of dirt off of the large toddler, he spoke.

“My name is Mako. But I like being called Hog,” he chirped. She hadn’t even thought to ask the little boys their names, assuming they couldn’t talk. Her lips formed a semblance of a motherly smile. 

“Hello, Mako. My name is Satya. What is the name of your little brother?” she asked gently, scrubbing his little head of hair with gentle shampoo.

“He’s not my brother. Uh,” He went into thought for a moment. “His name is Jamison, but I call him Jamie. Or Rat, ‘cause his nose looks like a rat’s,” he said with a smile. By the way he responded to the bath, it seemed he really enjoyed it. It was very clear he hadn’t gotten that kind of attention in a long time, and that broke Satya’s heart. 

When his bath time was done, she toweled him off, and dried his hair. He looked much happier and cleaner now that he wasn’t covered in filth and dirty clothes. Satya let him put his pants back on, but planned on buying him new ones as soon as possible. After she cleaned Jamison off with a wet towel, and washed his hair in the sink, she planned on going to the store to buy diapers, and food. She wasn’t really sure what babies ate, and didn’t have the first clue of what she was really doing, but had quite a bit of money saved up from over the years. Surely, she could afford to get these boys a few necessities.

After looking up ‘baby and toddler necessities’ on the internet, and searching for exactly what to get the boys, she walked out the door with Rat bundled in a blanket in one arm, and Hog holding her hand. There was a store very close to the apartment, and she made her way there. If she had known her shirt was covered in water and dirt from the boys, and that her makeup had gotten smudged, she would have never gone out in public. Even by mom standards, she was pretty messy.

The usually perfect Satya Vaswani had already had a very long day, and it wasn’t even lunch yet. She had reluctantly adopted two babies she’d found abandoned by their parents in a trash can, and was now searching in the middle of a store for baby supplies. Even when she finally did find them, she had a sleeping Rat in one arm, and Hog had her by her free hand and refused to even let go in the slightest.

“Hog, Satya promises she will take your hand again once she gets your things, please let go,” She felt like an idiot speaking in the third person like that.

“No,” pouted the her newly adopted son, holding onto her hand even tighter. 

It was no use; this little boy was just not going to give. She could raise her voice, but that would risk making Rat wake up. And besides, he had clearly been through a lot, and yelling wouldn’t really help anything. She saw a young man with black hair and big brown eyes, probably around fifteen, and called to him.

“Excuse me? Hello? Could you help me?” she called out to him, hoping that he would help her get everything she needed into the cart. He walked over, and took his headphones off, wondering what this messy looking grown woman wanted with him.

“Could you, please help me get some things into my cart? I have my hands full, as you can see. I need to get things for these boys,” she asked kindly.

“Alright,” the boy smirked, and added. “But only if you pay me five bucks,” He was a shameless opportunist, and had no problem extorting someone for a little extra cash.

Satya glared sharply, and sighed. “Fine, just help me get what I need,” she asked, and began listing off the items. Things such as a few onesies for each of the boys, five pairs of pants for Mako, a large packet of diapers, baby blankets, several jars of mushy food, a teething toy, two bottles and rubber bottle tops, juice, baby cereals, and chicken tenders. She remembered loving chicken tenders when she was a very little girl, and assumed Mako would too. 

Now, came the big things. A smaller crib, and larger one, for the boys to sleep in, a stroller so she never had this problem with her hands again, and a high chair to feed Rat in. She couldn’t believe she was investing so much money in these two little boys. Hog kept pointing to a set of finger paints the entire time, and she reluctantly had the boy add them to the cart as well. That should be everything they needed for the moment. 

The boy had to reach into her pocket and pull her wallet out, taking what she promised to him, and giving her card to the register omnic, who scanned it for her, and handed back. It came out to just a little over five hundred. There was plenty saved up, but it was still painful to watch all that money just kind of disappear, just like that. Now, was the task of getting all of this back to her apartment: yet another pain in the ass she had to figure out. 

“Mako, you’re going to have to get off of my hand. I need to get these things home, somehow. And that’s going to be very hard for me to do while you’re hanging onto me like that,” she sighed, explaining as calmly as possible. Mako, extremely reluctantly, let go of her hand. 

The shopping cart, stuffed to the brim, gave her an idea. She could take the cart home with her, and just return it the next day. After all, she was just a block away, and it would be very easy to take it back in the morning. She started loading all the bagged goods back in before hearing a loud, angry cry.

The teenage boy was making an absolute scene, screaming and crying with Mako’s teeth firmly latched onto his arm. His fat toddler fingers were searching around the kid’s pocket, and pulled out a Vishkar ID card. Vishkar ID’s, because of all the places they could get you, were worth quite a bit of money. 

Satya felt so stupid, letting that little rat go through her wallet. Why wouldn’t she just assume he was going to steal something? Teenagers were never up to anything good; she already assumed they were apathetic, dreary sad-sacks. Now, she could add ‘thief’ to that list. 

Mako only pried his teeth off of the adolescent when Satya gave his arm a good tug. There were deep teeth marks on the his arm, and blood was dripping out of the crevices. He winced, gripping his little wound with his good hand and glared at Satya and her boys before running full speed past them to the door. His face was red with shame; being frightened off by a fat toddler is not great for the ego.

With him out of the way, Satya pushed the cart all the way to her apartment door and immediately put the smaller one in a clean diaper, and the larger one in fresh clothes. Most of the items, with the exception of the two cribs, were pre-assembled. Though, for a world-class architect, it took mere moments for her to put everything together.

And then she realized she probably could have saved a lot of that money and just made these things out of hard-light technology. Ugh, that made her feel stupid. She collapsed, exhausted, on the couch and watched the two little ones play together. Jamie clearly hadn’t learned to walk yet, but he crawled faster than a beetle; it was pretty cute. The two were painting on the floor using the fingerpaints Mako had begged for in the store. Of course, Satya had to cover her entirely white living room in paper first so that none of it got on anything important. 

The two little boys were probably very hungry, she figured, maybe it was time to make them lunch. After reading the instructions on the bag of chicken nuggets three or four times, she felt adequately prepared to make Mako lunch. Jamison was much easier, since all he required was for her to open the jar and spoon the mush into his mouth. With big blue oven mitts on both hands, Satya placed the tray of nuggets into the pre-heated oven and shut the door. 

Hog peeked in the kitchen. “Miss Satya, may we use the really big piece of paper?” There was construction paper she had left in the living room with them, that must be what they were talking about. She nodded, smiling. 

When the nuggets were ready, she went back into the living room to get the two only to find her perfectly white couch was now covered in little blue and red handprints, and that there were now little yellow footsteps leading all the way to her bathroom. It then occurred to her that leaving the boys alone was the worst idea she had ever had. Very nervously, Satya followed the footsteps leading to the bathroom door, inching towards it with reluctance. What had these two done to her clean bathroom? Her stomach dropped to the floor, and her heart slowed as she got closer and closer. The door knob was covered in little green fingerprints. 

Satya put her rubber gloves on, and opened the door. Her jaw dropped to the floor, and her heart rate went from zero to one hundred in no time flat. Paint was everywhere. Jamie had apparently crawled in after Hog, and was currently working on making her porcelain toilet pink and yellow. The color drained from her face and she blinked rapidly, not wanting to believe her eyes. 

Hog had carried the paints in here and was now running rose-colored fingers all along the plain white shower curtain. Looking at it from this angle, it kind of resembled a very large sheet of paper. Satya’s knees buckled, and she surveyed the extent of the destruction her two boys caused, and couldn’t believe they could do this much damage in such a short amount of time.

She knew if she tried to speak, her words would come out as loud, incomprehensible screams, and that wasn’t what she wanted. 

“J-... Jamie, Mako? Lunch… Lunch is ready,” she choked out in between tears. 

“Nice, lunch! Come on Jamie!” The heavy set boy hopped up and sprinted as fast as he could to the kitchen, and Rat friend crawled after. 

Satya broke into a sob, mourning her clean bathroom after they left. So much time had gone into the upkeep of this room, and now, it was ruined. She ran her finger along the once eggshell wall, now covered in lime green. No, she had to get herself together. The bathroom could be cleaned up later.  
Hopefully.

“Boys, wash your hands. Jamison, wait for me, you can’t have chicken nuggets like Mako,” she yelled, rising to her feet. She took one last look at her bathroom, and closed the door behind her.


End file.
